Dear Future Husband,
I had previously written plenty of letters to you, but I have had to scrap them… but I think after everything that God had spoken to me about during this woman’s conference, I will finally take up the courage to start writing.
To be honest, I’ve been so burned from relationships in the past few months, I don’t even want to dream of you, I am so completely put off by the thought of allowing any other guy into my life that the thought seems wrong.
I hope one day, when you read these letters, Daddy would have prepared your heart for it, cos it’ll be messy, it’ll be honest, and it sure as hell would be intense. I’m doing this because I felt Daddy wanting me to start writing to you… I’ve been enjoying just having alone time with Him, and so being prompted to write to you, scares the s*** out of me… Maybe by the time I meet you, I would have dropped my bad swearing habit too…
As much as I want to portray myself as the perfect wife to be, I don’t think God had wired me that way at all… You’re going to read alot about my fears, my trials, my frustrations, my past failures and mistakes, the fights I’ve had with Daddy and the moments when I felt like I’ve lost my way and any hope of redemption. Probably mostly, about all the times when the spirit of stupid came upon me and I’m kicking and screaming whilst Daddy is dragging me towards my destiny…
BUT! Hopefully… just HOPEFULLY… you’d be able to see a glimpse of my heart, my love for God, my love for our daughter(s)/Son(s), and the dreams and visions God has placed on my heart prior to meeting you. I pray that despite my brutal honesty, it’ll be a journey worth your while and that through this, Daddy will be preparing my heart to be able to love you well, just as he had always envisioned.
No matter how daunting it is to have a little hope in being able to trust another man with my heart again, I will trust that this time, as I learn to walk well with Daddy, he will lead me right to you at the perfect moment.
With lots of hesitant love,
Little Miss J ♥